🔗 Share this article

“Well, the situation is pretty dire here. We’re advising all of our clients to put everything they’ve got into tinned provisions and hunting rifles.” This nugget of wise counsel comes from the Brain Gremlin – a lab-engineered, articulate, bespectacled member of the oozy monster mob that infests Manhattan’s super-smart Clamp Tower skyscraper in helmer Joe Dante’s zany follow-up Gremlins 2: The New Batch. Superficially, it’s simply an portfolio pointer from one monster to another. But, oddly enough, it’s also remarkably sound existential counsel. Seriously, listen to my reasoning.

When life takes a turn for the worse, the worst thing you can do is take things too seriously. The Brain Gremlin grasps this. Indeed, most of the toothy monsters that populate Dante’s unrestrained 1990 movie (debateably his greatest) possess the same wry, meta sense of humour regarding the blurry line separating the mundane and pure pandemonium. It’s a single component of Gremlins 2: The New Batch that ensures my return – and as I age, it’s the message that resonates the most.

An Early Life Fascination

Of course, my connection with this movie did not begin on such an deeply thoughtful note. Growing up, we possessed merely a few well-worn videocassettes at home. Included within that collection were Gremlins and its follow-up, the latter housed in a thick former-rental sleeve likely purchased from an non-chain rental store and featuring grimacing beasts on its knackered cover. I was right away smitten and these films quickly proceeded lodging themselves inside my small, malleable brain. From then on, they became an near-everyday part of my youthful watching schedule.

Dante’s original commonly garners all the accolades, thanks mostly because of its status as a semi-scary seasonal fave – and don’t get me wrong, I’ve watched Gremlins more times than I can count. That said, its successor seldom receives the same level of high regard, which feels criminal. As a kid, I’d always seize the chance to watch Gremlins 2. During bright summer vacations, I’d seclude myself indoors and stick it on. When I got my own TV-VHS combo unit, it remained on repeat in my bedroom. Gradually, it became deeply rooted in my mental framework. If my parents detected this preoccupation, they gave no indication of concern.

Hidden Delights and Pop-Culture Nuggets

As I grew, new insights enriched frequent screenings, elevating the fun of watching little green monsters happily vandalize a New York high-rise. I learned the forward-thinking real estate tycoon and Clamp Tower owner, Daniel Clamp (John Glover), was based squarely upon the eventual commander-in-chief Donald Trump, with his red-headed employee Marla (Haviland Morris) echoing his one-time partner Marla Maples. Luckily, Clamp possesses greater compassion than his actual-world equivalent.

The “apocalyptic” video Clamp plays during the height of creature carnage? I discovered it was inspired by a genuine “Doomsday” video produced by the CNN boss Ted Turner should the world actually met its demise. I noticed how Dante went out of his way to film different iterations of a self-aware scene where Gremlins take over the very film you’re watching. A version for theaters, a separate one for tape and broadcast, each delivering a smirking slice of fourth-wall-breaking cultural alchemy prior to the concept being mainstream.

A Lasting Appeal

While it was effects expert Rick Baker’s gloriously nasty-looking creatures that captured my attention as a child, this deeper gold maintained my fascination as an adult. Eventually, I even conversed with Dante about it myself and he had no qualms informing me he made the movie with the direct intention of poking fun at those who loved its goofy-but-heartfelt predecessor and desired a sequel. “We were going to make fun of the fact you came to see it,” he happily revealed. This cartoonish defiance and resolve to not take his sequel as solemnly as his Warner Bros bosses evidently expected, only increased my affection for it.

When I went through a abrupt familial death recently, I was astonished to realize that, during my heightest mourning, all I desired to do was sit and watch Gremlins 2: The New Batch. Weird, right? Possibly not. The comforting familiarity it furnished was essential to dilute my mind’s sadness sludge – but the stuff it had given me as an adult were similarly beneficial.

Like Gremlins tearing apart a genetics laboratory, there’s particular aspects in life you just can’t control. Dante is aware of it. The Brain Gremlin knows it too. Sometimes, you have to be like them: accept the turmoil, put everything you’ve got into tinned provisions and hunting rifles and try not to view the world with undue solemnity.

It’s powerful existential guidance from a very unlikely source – and it’s why Gremlins 2: The New Batch will forever remain my go-to cinematic solace.